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Senator Larry Craig Visits Home 'O' Days


From Staph And Wire Reports
HIGHLAND HEIGHTS, OHIO-Senator Larry Craig paid a recent visit to the Highland Heights Patrolman Joseph Mennonite Community Park (remember, Negroes Not Welcome) during the annual Home 'O' Days Celebration 2 weeks ago and got a thrill beyond his wildest expectations.  "I was taking a shit in the park restroom" said Craig, "and while standing up to wipe my ass, I put my feet apart in an 'A' formation to keep my pants from falling to the floor. A cockroach ran across the stall, just into the next, and I was able to trap it under my foot" Craig continued.  "I knew it wasn't Gary McKee because I had just seen him at the pool talking to a group of very young girls while Yazeed Essa swam by, so I tapped my foot on top of it in order to kill it. After giving it 3 firm taps, I heard a distinct humming noise and suddenly a cross-eyed Highland Heights PATROLMAN with a greasy head
crawled under the divider", said Craig.  "He grabbed my penis and started sucking it methodically. 'He's done this before', I remember thinking, because I exploded my warm, gooey jizz all over his face and shit-covered lips in an instant. He was a real pro.  As he started looking up at me from his knees, he said 'Scott, I'm sorry for telling my kids about the teen suicide attempt....' and then as he looked into my face he said 'Wait a minute, YOU'RE NOT MAYOR COALMAN! But hey', he continued, 'I'm always  cockhungry so any old cock will do, and Jimmy won't be in here for another 20 minutes'.  As I softened, he continued to suckle on my penis like an underage wifes breast, making his weird humming noises. When he was done, I gave his greasy head a few mushroom stamps and then he slithered back over to his stall and slumped down on the floor" said Craig.  "Highland Heights Home 'O' Days is awesome", said the Senator. " I will definitely be back to take a shit in Highland Heights next year". 

What else is Highland Heights good for?

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Disclaimer:For entertainment purposes only. Some of this site is opinion. Not intended to threaten, harass, or annoy. This website is NOT produced by Mark Joseph, duh!
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